Wish you would step back from that ledge

It's a pretty, grey, cold day. And I am wasting it lying in bed. I can partially be excused, I have trapeze tonight till 10, and then am working from midnight to 10am. I tried to sleep later, but really couldn't. Which is terribly unfortunate, since I stayed up really late, in an attempt to be able to sleep really late. Not so much. I'll get up and get food soon, and then do research on Fiddler on the Roof. I'm doing a lightning fast design of that at an all girls school next week. I have 3 3 hour afternoons to focus what I want, and cue it, and then thursday and friday it's performed. Wheeeee. Pays well, though. And the guy who hired me for it is someone who I didn't think would ever hire me for anything. He was one of the designers that I sent my resume to when I first got here, but I was stupid, and forgot to attach it when I emailed him. I realized this right away, and resent it, but the impression was already made. Fortunately, a friend of mine works with him, so I've since had the chance to meet him a couple times in person, and it seems I've gotten a second chance.
I don't entirely know what's happening today. Originally, John was going to take me to the container store to get bookshelves. It would have to be a quick trip, which is all sorts of sad because I absolutely love the container store. The boxes! The shelves! The superfluous gadgets! It makes the ocd part of me sing inside. But then last night I was being a total brat and kept asking him to come over, watch a movie or something, go for a drive. Until he reminded me that he has a ton of studying to do, and has an outline for a 20 page paper due thursday. And then I felt really bad for trying to distract him, so I told him that he didn't have to take me, and that he should study and I would see him saturday night or something. At which point he said that he wanted to, and that we would watch a movie. I ended up telling him to call me when he woke up, and that we would figure it out then. Who knows when that will be. I figure if he hasn't called me by 4 (which is a possibility, he was up past 3 last night, probably into morning) then I'll just go myself, and see what the deal is with delivery. I think it's only 35 bucks, but the thing with the bookshelves said that there's a 10 dollar handling fee with each. So, that owuld end up being 65. And that is perhaps a bit much. Since they're no longer on sale (stupid! should have bought them a month ago when they were!) it's already going to be more than I had anticipated. Fortunately, worth it. These are what I'm getting. I really like them. I'm getting 5 total, 4 that will be stacking and for the majority of my books, and then one for next to the mirror, for either all my theatre books, or all my non-fiction in general. I might have too many theatre books to have room for anything else. We'll see. The crappy part? These are exactly the bookcases that are sitting in my aunts storage space in chicago! I technically already own 12 of these! grrr. Oh well. I'm trying to convince myself that shipping them from there would cost about the same as just buying them. And so now, if I ever get them, and move into a giant apartment, I will have 17 of them to put to use. Clearly, I'll have to buy more books to fill them with.
Anyway. I'm getting pretty hungry. And I have things to mail. Giving away all my money. So I will get up, get food, eat, perhaps shower, perhaps nap, perhaps see John.
I like my room this way. I still can't figure out why it looks more dorm-ish, though. maybe because now when you come in, the first thing you really see is the desk? and before it was the bed?