I've built me dreams around you

Well fuck. The UES room that I wanted, she gave to a friend. Of course. Fuck. I'm trying really hard to remember that everything happens as it should, and that I can't get too bummed out because being pessimistic will just defeat me in general. But man. I really liked it. It clicked with me. I stopped looking for places. I knew it was going to be ough and take persistance, but I've also been counting on my tendency towards good luck, and that's just not working. I'm kind of upset, even. I don't know if I should let myself be upset for a bit, or if I should just shrug it off and say, well, let's see where I should live instead, obviously that place wasn't meant to be. I don't know. I don't know how much of a choice I actually have.