L is for the way you look tonight

I am so not the person I was in middle school. I mean, that's to be expected. And I'm only 22, I'm probably not the person I'll be when I'm 30. But I was thinking about this the other day. Because I like skirts now. Eight or ten years ago, I would be mildly horrified to meet me now. Things that have changed- I like skirts, I am much more picky about how jeans look on me, I like heels, I'm starting to do stuff with my hair. In writing (from a strictly technical stance) I think I've changed the most. I'm still the OCD person who would rewrite her math homework if the problems didn't line up on the page right. And I still can't stand different kinds of writing on the same page (ie no switching cursive to printing, one kind of writing implement the whole time, etc), BUT I used to only write in pencil. I hated pens and swore I would never succumb to them. Apparently I have, I almost always use pens. Also, because I've gotten all trained in lettering, I use it almost all the time. I used to think people who wrote in all capital letters were dumbasses and tools. But I do now. That, or cursive. But my printing sucks, and always kind of has, and my lettering looks pretty good, so it makes sense that I would switch to that as an alternative for cursive. But still. Also, I used to refuse to write if the paper didn't have lines. Now, I could go either way. You expect to change as you grow up, personality-wise, and it's kind of interesting to look at the habits that have changed.
So yesterday Jill and I didn't see Stranger That Fiction. We were going to, but it was at 1 40, and we got there at like 1 41, and I refuse to go into a theater once it's technically started, it's awkward and fumbling and often kind of rude. So we got tickets to see Flushed Away instead. And then went and got a crepe to kill time. I was also really hungry, and a few weeks ago I discovered this crepe stand that has this awesome ratatouille crepe that I get with goat cheese added. Anyway, Lily works there. She went to school with us, a year ahead, and she took foooorreeevvver to graduate. Well, not really, but she walked at graduation, and then the next year we still saw her in the computer room because she hadn't finished all her credits or something, and then once she had, we still saw her because she would use our sound editting programs for stuff. So anyway, it was a little weird to run into her, but she was nice, and made me a good crepe. We went back to the theater to eat it (they have this kind of second floor lobby, where you can kind of be separate from the concessions line and people going in and all, and there's tables overlooking the street) and as we're going in, as we're going up the escalator, Jill suddenly starts and says "Jenny?" and holy cow, yes, there in Jenny P. going down on the other side. So she runs back up, and we talk for a bit. She was in our class freshman year, and was awesome, she was totally cute, and nice, really friendly and one of those people who you have a good casual relationship with. But then she had to leave at the end of the year to take care of her mother, who was really sick, and then she never made it back, which was really sad. She was a good costume designer, and a good artist. So now she just bought a house with her boyfriend (whoa. She's my age. What the hell) and is working at some office, and she's going to get her business degree soon. Which is a totally different direction, but it seems to suit her. Jill and I spent the next half hour worried about who else from cornish we might run into, like Clark, or the pathological liar Lily, both who were in our freshman class with us and left before the end of the year. But we didn't see any one else.
Flushed Away was surprisingly really good. I had no idea what it was about or anything, just knew that it existed. And I really liked it. There's all sorts of clever funny things in it, none too subtle, and it was good fun. We had completely blanked on the fact that we were seeing a PG animated movie on a sunday afternoon, and the theater was filled with kids under the age of 10. And it was fine. Seriously, it was the best behaved theater of children I have ever seen. There was one girl and her dad sitting next to me, and a couple times she said something like "This is scary" or "I don't like this part" in this kind of cute faint-but-definite voice, and he unobtrusively put her on his lap, or took her out of the theater for a minute. But that was it, and even that was nothing. And it was a surprisingly good movie.
After that, Jill had to go to strike, and I had to go to balboa class. Last week and this week, there have been a shortage of leads, which is really odd since at the beginning, we were turning them away (which is odd in the first place). But it was fine. And we learned this turning thing that's pretty cool, and I am pretty good at it. This is a kind of dance that I'm finding really hard to practice without a partner, particularly this move, because there's a bit of momentum involved. Check this out to see what kind of dance this is. I hadn't actually seen it before I decided to take the class, I just knew that it was kind of like swing, but with a closed position most of the time. I don't really think it's like swing at all, the base step is kind of opposite, and it's shuffly, where's swing is more bouncy. But they're the same era of music, and they both have the kind of easy unconcious feel to them, when done well. Also, I've never done east coast swing, so maybe it's closer to that. At the end of class, they told us to come back for the night, there was going to be a live band. I ended up not going. I wanted to, but I would be totally by myself, and maybe I would know people from the class, but I don't really talk to them ever. Not that any of us are unfriendly, but I'm shy, and there really isn't room for side chatter and getting-to-know-you conversations. So I would go, alone, and wait for some one to ask me to dance. Which is fine, but what if no one did? Or what if they did, and I totally sucked? Which I don't think I would, but what if they were much better than me, and I didn't know the steps, or if I tried to lead, which always fucks things up. And it was raining. So I went home, and intended to go, but my internet was down, so I couldn't look up the time, or cover charge or anything, and then Jill called me so we could try to go see another movie. So that ended that possibility. We were both hungry, so we went to the Cheesecake Factory, which was right across the street form the movie theater, but we ended up being there for too long, and just went home. Eh. It was an okay evening in any case. And I had a raspberry martini that was seriously the best thing in the entrie world. Maybe not. But it was definitely the best mixed drink I've ever had. I got tiramisu as desert, which was really good too. Except for the coffee part. I still hate both the taste and smell of coffee. I told Vanessa that once, and she looked at me all shocked and said "But heaven smells like coffee" to which I replied that it was a good thing, then, that I had a spot reserved in hell. Then I went home, and my internet was still not working. So I finished the book I started earlier, "Snow Flower and the Secret Fan" which was pretty good. I started reading some one's copy at Camp this summer, but didn't get very far into it before the session ended and they left, so it was good to reread the brginning and finally read the rest. It's about this girl in China, in the time of footbinding, and about the kind of arranged friendships that they have. There were arranged marriages, which you had no choice in, and then you could have this group of friends, your sworn sisters, and they were also kind of arranged, except you could say no if you wanted to. But why would you? How else do you have friends, when you can't go anywhere without either your natal or your married family's permission. Anyway, if you're really lucky, then you get a laotong, some one who was born the same day and time as you, with the same number of siblings, the same place among those siblings, and the same height and foot size. It's pretty rare to get all those together (although sometimes they ignored when one or two things didn't quite match), so it was pretty special. It's a good book, and very interesting to read, particularly because the main character makes a huge mistake, realizes it, and attempts to attone for it. But I'm not convinced (and maybe I need to reread it) that she really realized her mistake. I kind of think how she goes about attoning for it shows that she didn't really get it, only understood the effect. And given the time period and setting, I think that part is really true. As much as I'd have liked an ending that I agreed with more, I like the feeling of accuracy of humanity. I'm not saying this very well. All in all- good book, worth reading. It's a pretty fast read, I feel like, too. Maybe that's just me.
This is the longest entry I've written in a while. I'm done now.