You were the love for certain of my life

Oh boy. Today was a mix. But it mostly went well, I think. Maybe. I had a paper tech meeting, telling the stage manager where cues happen in the script. I was very vague and didn't give her that many, because I anticipate a decent amount of small shifty cues, and I can't really give her those until I set them during tech with actors. But we got the big ones settled, and she seemed fine with that, as did the director. Roberta, on the other hand freaked mildly when I told her this. So now I have a meeting with her tomorrow. Apparently, before I go into tech, I am supposed to have all my cues written. And tech should be spent just adjusting them. What? Ummm. I always thought tech was for writing cues. And that you could write some in advance, but every tech I've seen in the outside world, they write the cues as they go, and give the numbers to the stagemanager as they go. And this works very well. I understand that this is school, and so it works differently, but this is one difference that I don't see a good reason for. Whatever. I kicked ass on my focus and work notes, and so I spent three hours tonight writing cues. Maybe it was more like two and a half, but anyway. I got into the start of the second act written, and I know I'll have to adjust a lot, and stuff will be added, but I think it looks okay. And there's a few cues that I think look fucking fantastic. I'll post pictures eventually. Oh, if anyone in Seattle reads this, feel free to come see it. Email me or somthing for details. Anyway. So now I feel like I'm way ahead of the game, I'm taking tomorrow to watch a run-thru. Wednesday I'm showing some of this stuff to the director, and then watching them work on the stage some, and then I forget what thursday is. But tech starts friday night. And then I have to miss out on juggling saturday for more tech. Oh well. I dunno. I am definitely questioning one of my color choices, but I think I can work with/around it, and I feel really solid and good about everything else. And I feel like Roberta is going to just look unhappy at me, and make me feel like I'm way behind and unprepared and unprofessional and just in general not fit to be a lighting designer. None of which is true. Not that I'm doing everything perfectly, but I'm doing pretty damn good on this project, and no one else seems to object to my methods. I'm frustrated by the fact that she is judging me, and because of our history and my experiences outside of Cornish I don't respect her judgement very much but it still affects me, both in that it affects my grade, and I still somehow care what she thinks. And she's not all bad. In the beginning of this process, she was very helpful, asking questions and helping me think about everything that I needed to consider. But now I'm just irritated, and I clench my jaw a lot around her. bleh.
Working tonight, though, I hit my stride. I really love theatre. And I really love cueing, and I think I'm good at it. I know my plot well, and I'm coming up with good stuff. Vanessa also gave me a good space to light. And in the back are these hanging strands of bunches of leaves, some of which are translucent, in dark red and yellowish and brown, and they just take light beautifully. It's pretty magical when I use it. One of the things the script kind of calls for is a sunset, so I kind of painted on them with light, and it's freaking gorgeous. I can't wait till Vanessa sees it, I think she's going to be really happy with it. There's one moment at night where they kind of look underwaterish, and it looks cool, but I don't know if other people will like it as much as I do. We'll see. Anyway. Also: I now have 292 movies in my netfl1x queue. This is very exciting. There are all kinds of movies I want to see, and I'm going to get to. But it makes me very impatient. It doesn't help that when I am bored and avoiding homework I watch previews and add things to the list.