Pressure! Pushing down on me

Okay, things are better. I told Anne-Marie that perhaps it would be easier to find a place if we didn't live together, so I may be off that hook. So, on to better things, like last night.
I went to juggling. It was weird, everyone kind of juggles by themselves, and looks sideways at what other people are doing. I am not that good, so people didn't watch me much, which was good. I worked on stuff by myself, under the leg and consecutive doubles. I ended up passing with a young toolface for a while. And then a young decent guy. It was weird, he threw mainly tricks- doubles, tomahawks, sidespins. In Seattle, it was about patterns, and making your brain hurt because you couldn't remember which hand you were passing to next. I haven't juggled for that long in a while, my back and upper arms were a little sore today.
Afterwards, we all (about 20 people) went across the street for Chinese food. Apparently this happens every thursday, and the restaurant knows they're coming, sets up the tables and everything. It was kind of fun. I felt a little awkward, but it was okay. I talked to everyone, told them who I was and what I'm doing blahdy blah. There was a lot of repeating. One of the guys speaks chinese, and so when the fortune cookies came, everyone read him their vocabulary word, and he had to try to hear through their terrible pronunciationo and translate it. I ended up riding the subway with him, and there was more repeating and explaining my circumstances. But I liked everyone, and they were very encouraging. I just need to find more people to pass with, ones who aren't 16 year old tools.
It will be a very long time before I get tired of the subway. It's all sorts of good people-watching fun. But there's something more than that, and I don' know what it is. Maybe being in transit. I'm reading The Satanic Verses right now, it's actually pretty good subway reading.
I got lots of good emails today. From two people who gave me job connections, and from two designers who I'm going to meet up with. One of them is going to get me tickets to a preview of one of his shows in April. Cool beans. And my aunt and cousin are back, and I like both of them, so I'm pretty stoked about that. We got a giant dinner, and Sarah introduced me to menupages.com, which very well may be the best thing ever. So now, I am flopped on the couch (sad, after the luxury of Sarah's bed) watching Freaky Friday. I was watching Ghost, but it turned out to be more intense than I wanted to watch right now. I will sleep in tomorrow. Today was stupidly long. I even went to look at an apartment. Futilely, since I'm not living with Anne-Marie anymore. Oh man. Every time I say that, I can feel a weight lifting off my chest. It's great.